


closure

by nightstreet



Category: True Beauty - Yaongyi (Webcomic), 여신강림 | True Beauty (Korea TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, F/M, Friendship above all, Hurt/Comfort, POV Outsider, post canon k-drama, there will be an anxiety attack so please caution in reading, this is NOT a fic perpetuating the love triangle but supporting Seojun finding closure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:33:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29521617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightstreet/pseuds/nightstreet
Summary: There are five moments where Han Seojun realizes that maybe Im Jugyeong and Lee Suho do need each other.
Relationships: Jugyeong Lim/Suho Lee
Comments: 37
Kudos: 79





	closure

**Author's Note:**

  * For [astiluor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/astiluor/gifts).



_1._

Seojun meets up with Suho on a Friday night at a bar to catch up for some drinks. Since they’ve been incredibly busy recently – with Seojun working on his album and Suho studying for his college admissions test, they’ve hardly had enough time to hang out.

When Suho approaches, Seojun can’t even hold in his laughter at the ridiculous sight. “ _What_ are you wearing?” Seojun howls, gesturing at the scarf around Suho’s neck. “Did you die last night and come back as a grandmother? Or did you perhaps hit your head when you were picking out your clothes this morning?”

Suho narrows his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “It’s a scarf,” he states, defensively.

Seojun snickers in response, tugging at the scarf with a ridiculous orange print on it. It looks out of place on Suho – especially with his camel-colored coat and white turtleneck. “I think my mom has the same exact one in brown,” Seojun teases.

“Very funny,” Suho responds with annoyance. “It’s cold outside, I forgot my scarf, and Jugyeong’s mom insisted I wear this as I was leaving their house.”

Seojun rolls his eyes. “Ahhhh, so you’re doing this to impress your girlfriend’s mom,” he says, sounding heavily unimpressed. “Never thought I’d see the day where _God Suho_ is kissing up to someone else.”

Suho rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, whatever, let’s go inside,” Suho responds, walking past him and heading towards the door.

At the end of the night, they’re both probably around 5 shots of soju in and feeling ridiculously tipsy, if not completely drunk. As they’re heading out to leave, Suho picks up that same ugly scarf from the chair and wraps it around his neck.

“Im Jugyeong’s mom isn’t even here,” Seojun says, slurring his words a little. “You don’t need to wear that still.”

“She put this on me so I wouldn’t get sick again,” Suho mumbles, sounding almost childish in his drunken voice. Seojun glances over at Suho, but the world is looking a bit blurrier.

“You’re such a mama’s boy,” Seojun says without thinking.

Suho looks up suddenly and there’s a pang in Seojun’s chest after he realizes what has just come out of his mouth.

“You’re right,” Suho says, his face flushed – though Seojun is not sure if it’s from the alcohol or his own careless words. “I haven’t had a mom in a long time,” he admits. “I guess I wanted to remember what it was like.”

Han Seojun suddenly feels a lot more sober.

_2._

“Did you just win the lottery or something?” Seojun asks from across the table, raising his eyebrows.

They’re at the same spot that he and Jugyeong usually eat, the place with the spicy tteokbokki that he still insists isn’t too spicy for him, though he’ll choke down water every time to quench the fire.

“Nooo,” Jugyeong says, pursing her lips and trying to hide her giddy expression, though her eyes are still lit up.

Seojun tries to look bored. “Then why are you smiling like a little kid?”

Jugyeong’s attempted poker face is broken immediately as the wide smile crosses her face. “Because of _this!_ ” Jugyeong exclaims in excitement, pulling out a comic book from her bag and shoving it right in front of him.

There is a graphic illustration of a zombie. In his face. Seojun jumps back in horror.

“Ya! What is that _nasty_ thing?” Seojun barks.

Jugyeong snickers in response, leaning back in her chair as if she was expecting that exact reaction. She looks down at her food with a smile. “I wouldn’t expect you to know what it is since you have no taste,” she replies, nonchalantly, playing with the fish cake on her plate.

“ _No taste?_ ” Seojun responds, insulted.

“It’s a _first edition_ , _signed_ copy of _Santamu’s_ debut comic _T_ _he Night in Hell_. _”_ Jugyeong proclaims proudly, though it just sounds like a lot of words that mean nothing to him. He raises his eyebrows at her enthusiasm.

“There are only 200 of these in the world, you know!” Jugyeong hugs the book to her chest with child-like happiness – he’d never admit it, but he finds her passion kind of endearing.

“Two hundred people bought that thing?” Seojun asks instead, slight judgment in his voice. She looks completely unbothered by his tone.

“Yes! And now _I_ have one of them, thanks to Lee Suho!” she says with a bright smile.

The sound of Suho’s name from her mouth still bothers him a little. He mentally tries to force the feeling away.

“Lee Suho bought you that?” Seojun snorts.

“It was for our anniversary!” she exclaims, looking down at the book -- still in awe.

Seojun is in disbelief. “It’s your anniversary and your boyfriend got you… a book? No flowers? Or chocolates?”

Jugyeong rolls her eyes in response. “I would smack you on the head with this book, but I think it’ll lose value if it touches your head,” she replies with a smile.

“More like it’ll gain value,” Seojun rebuts, a cocky edge to his voice though it’s clear that he’s just joking. “Touching a popular new idol’s head? It’ll make that comic book of yours become _priceless_.”

Jugyeong crinkles up her nose in disgust. She slips the book back into her bag before mumbling, “It’s already priceless to me.”

“Just because Lee Suho gave it to you?” he asks, incredulously.

“No,” she says, defensively. “Because he gave it to me _and_ he knew it would be exactly what I wanted.”

He wants to tease her for being so cheesy, but she's calling over a waitress to ask for more water.

Seojun thinks he’ll never really understand.

_3._

He’s a little late to their usual restaurant that day because rehearsals over time, so everyone’s already seated inside. When he gets there, Kang Sujin is outside taking a phone call. He steps by her to open the door and head on inside when he feels her grab him by the arm, a little too roughly.

Seojun shakes her off, shooting her a displeased look. “ _Why_ are you touching me?”

Throughout the past few months, Sujin has slowly become integrated into their friend group -- but Seojun still holds a small amount of resentment towards her. Though Jugyeong and Suho were quick to forgive her, Seojun has never been one to let things go as easily.

Sujin signals for him to wait with her palm up as she ends her conversation and hangs up the phone.

“What do you want?” he asks again, coldly, as Sujin puts her phone in her pocket.

“Im Jugyeong cut her bangs,” Sujin tells him, her voice as smooth as always.

He hadn’t expected that. “So?” Seojun remarks, a mixture of both annoyance and confusion in his voice. “Why do I care?”

“She did it herself this morning,” Sujin clarifies, sticking both her hands in her pockets.

He laughs in response. “That clumsy girl cut her own bangs?”

“Yeah, I know,” Sujin answers, disapprovingly, almost like a mom. “I’ve been telling her it doesn’t look bad, but she regrets it now and she’s been crying all day about it.”

“So,” she says, narrowing her eyes at Seojun. “Don’t you dare make fun of her.” She crosses her arms over her chest.

Seojun mirrors her by also crossing his arms over his chest. “Ya! What kind of person do you think I am?” Seojun retorts, slightly offended.

Sujin only gives him a knowing look. “The kind of person that would make fun of her,” she replies, not convinced.

"And _you_ 're better?" Seojun says with a scoff.

The look on Sujin's face makes him feel like he just beat up a puppy. But almost as quickly as he sees it, the momentary expression of weakness is gone. "I'm not," Sujin says with a heavy sigh. "But I'm trying to be."

Seojun feels incredibly awkward now, shuffling his feet on the floor. "Okay, okay," Seojun says, holding his hands up in surrender. "I won't make fun of her," he promises.

When he enters the restaurant and takes a seat across from Jugyeong, he doesn’t even see what the big deal is because her hair looks fine. It’s normal. It’s different, but she still looks like Im Jugyeong as always.

He’s about to open his mouth to say just that when Suho walks through the door suddenly. “I’m so sorry I’m late,” he apologizes to the table. “The cram session went longer than expected.”

Jugyeong’s eyes light up as he comes up to take the seat next to her. Seojun expects to feel that same familiar twist in his chest when he sees them together, but surprisingly it's not there today. He looks down at his own heart, confused.

“Suho, my best friend!” Taehoon calls from across the table, almost on cue with a high five. Suho, now used to his antics now, reciprocates.

As he begins to take off his jacket and sit down, Seojun notices that Suho’s expression softens when he looks over at Jugyeong. “You cut your hair?” Suho asks, his voice light.

Choi Soo-ah and Kang Su-jin freeze in their seats in anticipation.

“I did,” Jugyeong answers, her voice sounds less confident than usual.

And then, to Seojun's surprise, Suho gives her a smile – one of his rare smiles that he never sees. Almost like it's only reserved for her. “It looks good,” Suho tells her.

“Really?” Jugyeong asks and everyone can tell she's already shining a little brighter.

Seojun wants to look away but he can't.

“It does,” Suho affirms with a nod in response, resting his arm comfortably on the back of her chair.

“How come you don’t ever compliment me like that?” Soo-ah whines loudly from next to Seojun, causing him to jump up. She smacks Taehoon on the arm with a pout on her face.

“I compliment you like that _all_ the time!” Taehoon argues back, rubbing his arm from pain with a grimace on his face.

The attention is off Suho and Jugyeong now and on Soo-ah and Taehoon, but Seojun still catches the secret smile they share with each other.

He hopes one day someone will look at him like that.

_4._

Because the weather’s been getting warmer, Yoo Taehoon decides to host a BBQ at his house. He insists on everyone coming because they haven’t hung out together in such a long time and it’s only proper since Hyun-gyu is moving to start a new job in Busan next month.

“Hey, you jerk,” Seojun comes up from behind Suho with a clean pair of tongs. “Are you going to keep hogging the grill?”

They’re in the backyard of Taehoon’s house. The girls are sitting on a picnic blanket, giggling about something on Soo-ah's phone and the other boys are messing around with a football.

“If _you_ were cooking, all the meat would be burned,” Suho retorts back with contempt, though his tone is lighthearted.

“I’ll have you know; I am the best at grilling kalbi,” Seojun argues, brandishing his tongs like a weapon. “I know exactly when to flip it for the perfect balance of tenderness and crisp.”

Suho snorts in response. “I don’t believe that,” he says, picking up the cooked meat off the grill and putting them on a serving plate. He turns to Seojun, eyebrows raised. “I recall when we were younger, all the bulgogi you tried to cook ended up burned and we had only the banchan left to eat.”

“Ya! That was just that _one_ time and we were _thirteen_ ,” Seojun argues, shooting him an annoyed look. He nudges Suho in the shoulder. “Let me cook the next round.”

“Fine,” Suho relents, stepping back from the grill.

“Heads’ up!” Seojun hears someone call from behind him. He whips around to see Cho-rong is standing on the balcony above the yard, holding a Spikeball set above his head packed in a large black bag. He’s laughing with amusement.

“Don’t you dare throw it – that’s expensive!” Taehoon yells from the ground, mock angrily.

“Then you better catch it!” Cho-rong shouts. In a quick second, he doesn't hestitate in tossing the heavy bag over the balcony.

“I got it!” Hyun-gyu shouts, running towards the bag as Taehoon runs the same way from the opposite direction. As their bodies collide, the black bag falls loudly in front of Seojun and Suho with a loud _thud_.

Seojun looks over at Suho to roll his eyes and share a laugh at their stupidity, when he sees that Suho looks frozen, like a fish out of water. He’s staring down at the black bag, eyes wide in shock.

“Lee Suho?” Seojun asks in confusion. Time seems to move in slow motion.

Like he was just hit by a train, Suho suddenly falls to the ground, shaking, unable to catch his breath.

“Lee Suho!” Seojun shouts, buckling down immediately to try to catch him from falling. “What’s wrong? What’s happening?”

Suho can’t speak because he’s hyperventilating, grasping at his chest desperately as if he’s trying to tear it out, his pupils are dilated.

Seojun feels helpless and completely confused, grasping onto his arm, almost frozen in place as Suho’s shaking only intensifies on the floor.

From behind him, he hears Jugyeong’s voice, concerned and probably the most adamant tone he’s heard come from her mouth -- “Move,” Jugyeong demands.

Surprised by her determination, Seojun lifts his hands off Suho immediately, who is still powerlessly hyperventilating, his knees curled up to his chest and his head now hung into his hands. Lee Suho—calm and steadfast, is falling apart in front of his eyes.

Jugyeong is now down on her knees in front of him, instantly taking his hands into hers and looking right at him. Suho’s still looking down, desperately panting. “Lee Suho, look at me, I’m right here,” Jugyeong says with a sense of urgency, but her voice is calm.

Suho finally looks up at her, but he’s still trembling. Everyone’s gathering around them now, petrified and watching with concern. Kang Sujin tells everyone to back up-- don’t crowd them.

“Can you get me that water bottle on the table? And open it.” Jugyeong commands Seojun, not taking her eyes off Suho. 

Seojun moves quickly, turning around to snatch the water bottle off the counter and open the cap, his fingers shaking from the adrenaline. He turns around and she’s moved closer to Suho now. Everyone has backed up and is watching from a distance, but that doesn’t seem to matter because looking at them feels almost invasive – like they’re the only two people there.

Jugyeong is bringing his fingers up to her necklace right now -- the same one she wore every day in high school and the same one she’s been wearing every day since they got back together. “Do you feel this?” she asks, softly.

Suho can only nod in response. His breathing is still rapid, but seems not to be as debilitating as before.

“Good,” Jugyeong says, nodding along, speaking to him gently but still with an air of calmness. “Do you remember where you gave this to me?”

“In the woods,” he gasps, trying to speak. “During our school trip.”

Jugyeong gives him a small smile in response, affirming him. “And what does it feel like?” she asks. “Warm or cold?”

“Cold,” he breathes, his voice restrained.

Jugyeong then brings his hand from her necklace up to her cheek. “What about this?”

“Warm,” Suho responds. His breathing is beginning to slow; his eyelids are less retracted than before. “And soft.”

Jugyeong gestures at Seojun to hand her the water bottle, though she still doesn’t turn around, her eyes still on Suho. Seojun places it in her free hand, watching in awe, trying to stay as silent as he can in fear of possibly adding another trigger.

To Seojun’s surprise, Jugyeong starts pouring the water from the bottle on top of their hands. “What about this?” Jugyeong asks, intense concentration on her expression. “What does this feel like?”

“It’s wet,” he tells her – his voice sounding less restrained and a tiny bit more confident now. “A bit cold.”

“Good,” Jugyeong repeats. “Just focus on how it feels, okay?”

Suho nods and he’s watching their hands carefully as the water is drenching them and spilling onto the grass. His heavy breathing is beginning to return to normal. Seojun lets out a sigh of relief as he realizes that the worst of it seems to be over.

Jugyeong continues pouring water on their hands from the water bottle until it runs out. She then stops and puts the empty bottle down on the wet lawn next to them.

With her now free other hand, she grasps both of their hands together again, bringing them up to her lips. “Lee Suho, do you know who I am?”

Suho is no longer shaking or hyperventilating, but he looks completely exhausted. “Of course, I do,” he finally says after a moment. “You’re Im Jugyeong.”

The once collected composure on Jugyeong’s face morphs into a relieved smile. “Yes, I am,” she says.

“And you’re here again,” Suho breathes in response.

“I’m here,” she tells him, wrapping her arms around him.

Their exchange feels so intimate that Seojun has to look away. He looks behind him to see that everyone else has similar looks of relief on their faces. He realizes he must look the same way.

_5._

Later, Seojun walks up to stand by Jugyeong, who’s staring out the window in silence. Suho is passed out on Taehoon’s couch, sleeping soundly. Feeling slightly awkward, he clears his throat, unsure of what to say at first. “Does that… does _that_ happen often?” Seojun finally asks.

“No,” Jugyeong answers, shaking her head. “It’s only happened one another time since that day in the hospital. It scared me so much that I immediately went home and looked up grounding techniques just in case it happened again.”

Seojun is silent for a moment, stunned by this new knowledge. Does he really not know Suho at all? The guilt he feels is heavy on his chest. His eyes focus on a car that’s driving down the road out the window. “I didn’t know Lee Suho was struggling like that,” Seojun admits.

Jugyeong finally tears her eyes off the window in front of her to look up at him. “How could you know?” she mumbles, sadly.

“I’m his best friend,” he says, his voice cracking a little. “I _should_ know.”

“He wouldn’t want you to worry,” Jugyeong tells him, her eyes sincere. “He knows you’ve been under a lot of stress lately because of your debut and your album.”

“That’s not fair,” Seojun says, feeling choked up. He feels some tears prickling at the corners of his eyes. He brings his fingers up to the bridge of his nose, trying to will the emotions away. “He still should have told me. He doesn’t have to carry all this weight himself. He should know that.”

Jugyeong pauses for a moment before offering him a small but sad smile. “I know,” she agrees with him. “But he’s getting better at it.”

“I don’t believe that,” Seojun says, somewhat resentfully, a sigh escaping him.

“He is,” she says resolutely, turning around and leaning her back against the window. Her eyes are on Suho, his sleeping face so peaceful that he can hardly believe that was the same boy trembling on the ground earlier. “He’s been going to therapy.”

Seojun almost chokes in surprise. “Lee Suho?” he asks, incredulously, turning around also to look at Suho.

Jugyeong nods in response. “He doesn’t want anyone to know though, so don’t mention it to him.”

There’s a beat before Seojun speaks again. There’s a thought that crosses his mind – something that he hadn’t realized he’d been suppressing because of his previous feelings for Jugyeong and green envy towards Suho.

Seojun looks back over at Jugyeong and studies her face who is observing Suho with the purest love he's ever seen. He smiles.

“I’m really happy that he has you, Im Jugyeong.” There’s no longer a hint of jealousy or bitterness in his voice.

Seojun doesn’t know how or why, but suddenly he feels better. Like he’s been walking around carrying this resentment for so long and it’s finally gone. The weight has been lifted from his shoulders.

And for the first time, he thinks he finally understands.

+1.

Han Seojun runs into Kang Sujin at a coffee shop one Saturday afternoon after leaving his morning rehearsal. She’s sitting at one of the tables near the front of the shop, a ridiculously large stack of books in front of her. She looks incredibly concentrated.

He considers pretending that he doesn't see her, grabbing his cold brew and heading out the door, but something compels him to walk up to her.

“Oh, Han Seojun,” Sujin greets, glancing up at him from her notes.

“Did you rob a bookstore?” he asks, raising his eyebrows and resting his arm on top of the textbooks, casually.

She rolls her eyes. “No, I’m not a delinquent,” she says back, a little snarky. He can feel a missing _like you_ at the end of her sentence that makes him fight a smile. “I’m studying for the CSAT, actually,” she tells him.

Seojun hadn’t noticed until now, but there’s an air of maturity to her. Confidence that he hasn’t seen before. It’s almost like she’s a whole new woman from the girl that he knew in high school.

“Everyone’s studying for the CSAT now,” Seojun mutters, taking a sip of his cold brew.

She puts her pen down, almost as if to signal that she’s giving him her full attention now.

“Do you want to sit down?” Sujin asks. “You’re holding a lot of stuff.”

He’s not, really. It’s just his cold brew and a bag of snacks that he stole from the studio for Go-Woon. She's motioning at the chair in front of her.

“Why would I want to do that?” Seojun asks, with a little bit of an attitude.

He pulls the chair backwards and sits down with her anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone!! Thank you so much for your lovely comments and continuous support! I initially started writing Jugyeong/Suho because I didn't see many fics about them, so I'm happy to see so many of you also loving and supporting this really cute couple!
> 
> This fic is written for astiluor, who suggested I write a fic from Seojun's POV, so all credits to her!! I was apprehensive at first, but decided there had to be some way to do it where Seojun wasn't depicted as a beat-up puppy and Jugyeong/Suho weren't the perpetrators. Everyone is human, ya'll!! I love their friendship with each other more than anything so I wanted to protect that and also give Soejun some much needed closure.
> 
> Side note, Suho's anxiety attack is probably my favorite scene that I've written as of yet for Jugyeong/Suho (inspired by some of your comments!). In the drama, we've seen Suho support Jugyeong through all her insecurities so to be able to write a moment where Jugyeong is 100% in control and it's Suho that's struggling was a little cathartic!
> 
> Okay, I've rambled quite too much. thank you for reading as always.
> 
> tumblr: night--street


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